Walking at snail's pace...

2006-01-01T03:10:00.000+08:00

It's 2006 now....2005 came and went...so fast...when it seems like yesterday tt i find it passing too slowly...

How's 2005 been for you?

Have you fulfilled all your last new year resolutions? Are you making new ones now?

What does 2005 mean to me?

2... 2 impt people in my life left me...with one being a life and death seperation...
0... how i felt when these people left me....i felt zero...like i was nothing....
0... how God made me whole again...
5... fingers...a hand...finding true friends who gave me a pull....

2005 has definitely not been easy...but it's been a special year for me...
a year of maturity, a year of character moulding...
a year of much weeping...a year of much warmth and love
a year of finding out tt which is precious to you...a year of losing tt which u treasure...
a year of doubting...a year of assurance from Him...

I don't know how's your 2005...
but i know...and believe tt 2006 will be a better year yet...
Happy new year! =)

For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope.

2005-09-03T23:00:00.000+08:00

It's been yet another LONG time since i last blog..... i wonder if there's still anyone who log in to check if there're entries....
But i guess i'm still quite a dilligent blogger....a dilligent MONTHLY blogger....ha.....=)

just came back from a popiah making girls' gathering at a cg friend's house....it was so much fun...to have girls' talk...to hang out together...talking about anything and everything......and making popiah together...and being blessed with food from Batam and an organiser from Australia....

Hanging out w good friends...close friends....and having deep sharing...heart to heart talk can really give me adrenaline high....i enjoy and treasure every chance to be able to share openly with friends you know u can count on....

Thank God for opened doors of opportunities....i've grown closer to many pple in class...and in church... at least tt's how i feel....i feel so loved....

i feel so pampered.....

God is indeed good to me....He's blessed me with words of affirmation from friends... blessed me with financial blessings (from an annoymous person somemore...when i'm running into some difficulty..) and gifts...blessed my heart with joy,peace...and a sense of purpose every day of my life...even when things around me seems bleak...

Indeed....i think i've moved on relatively well.... I remembered what Prof Hsu told me before when i've just broken up....
"when God takes someone close to you away from you, He'll always replace Himself with it"

God, You have done exceedingly abundantly above all tt i could ask and think of....

2005-08-10T23:29:00.000+08:00

Singapore turned 40 yesterday...
and i managed to have a holiday to stay at home and finish up my work....tho' in d end...i still haven't coz i slacked too much....

it wasn't till evening 7pm like tt tt i went to bukit panjang plaza to meet out w hong yi (sorry alvin...ha...nv go marina eat steamboat w u).. well at first.. i was a bit d lazy and lethargic to go out...and everything...
BUT i enjoyed myself tt night....
it was fun hanging out and talking one-to-one with a long time friend... even tho it's just at kopitiam...and not say very quiet....haha
well..... hongyi said i've changed.... apparently i sounded like someone who can't wait to get married..haha... birds of a feather flock together =P
but u know what...yi...i think u've changed too.....
i think u've grown more mature in thinking and wiser (?) than the last time i see u.....
at least...i think....haha
It was really an enjoyable time together.... =)

well...not sure how many of u all know now....i have ants as pets now....
yes....i've finally put my b'day present (antswork) to good use.....
tho....i din catch the ants...jiahong did.... i just receive....
i din have to:
1. catch ants
2. sweat
3.be outsmarted by the ants...(haha...they're quite smart)
4.crack my brain on how to get the ants to stay in their new home
5.get goosebumps all over (i will...if i see ant nests)

it's cool to see the ants dig all the tunnels and all...haha
but not sure y....d ants are very lazy....(i hope they're not dying)
ever since jiahong gave me and ants and d existing tunnels....
till now (5 days past) they've only dug 1 cm of tunnel!!!
Sooooo lazy.....what can i do to motivate them to work hard??

you know.... ants are supposed to be v hardworking...they work hard to store food for winter..and for seasons of lack.... and we often learn impt work lessons from ants....
BUT my ants are so lazy....i don't feel motivated looking at them...
if i put them in the fridge...will they perceive that winter is coming den?
haha... no cruelty to animal..... i can almost hear jiahong's screams....and plus a few of his bunk mates'

2005-07-28T00:06:00.000+08:00

Bought lotsa stickers today...coz they were on sale.... 8 for only $1....
After buying them....heard from the nurses that they were selling 15 for $1 yesterday!
nevertheless....still very cheap lah...
bought: spiderman... hello kitty... spongebob... pooh... hamtaro...power ranger etc....
haha...not for me lah....for my pedo patients.... (if they are well behaved...it's NOT a bribe....)

you know...being a dental student...and having braces put on at the same time..... i find myself becoming PARANOID....
coz i'll be checking every now and then.... my bite... and seeing if my teeth have moved that micrometer bit.... and pushing them and all....hoping to hasten the process.....

And i can't helped but to keep staring at pple's teeth too....esp so if they have BAD teeth.... i'll just focus on it when i talk to them.....

so....u get the hint when i keep staring at your teeth while talking to you...=)

2005-07-24T23:37:00.000+08:00

Apologies to all.....

These few days have been so tiring for me....tt i became v absent minded.... and of coz... as my usual slow self..... and now plus fatique.... i've became almost incontactable.... living in seclusion....of coz...this is fustrating to those trying to reach me....so....i really wanna say sorry....to all who are irritated by my lack of enthusiasm whatsoever to reply smses...emails..... (if you had a few bald patches from pulling out your hair in fustration...sorry too!).... but i do appreciate your sms....and mails etc....and i'm v touched by everyone's gestures..... even tho' i'm those kinda person who prefers to put on a strong front..... cold and hard.... but i'm really melting inside..... and feel like giving u a big hug.....to let u know how much better u've made my day....

HY: So sorry that tho' you've been back...and yet i did not have d time to go out w you and meet u up..... and even not returning u smses.....or calling u.....i'm a bad friend....so sorry.... really hope to see u soon..... =( maybe can meet somewhere near my house?

YX: as usual....i did not reply your sms to go see YH's baby...and i only remembered it now....!!!

so....thank u all for having such great capacity to bear with me.....haha....i'll try to improve....=)

The boldest thing that I’ve done recently is

2005-05-30T00:52:00.000+08:00

The boldest thing that I’ve done recently is….
To go around to the next building’s food court to eat dinner….
In the middle of a hair cut…. and hair dye….with d dye hair thing wrapped round my head!!!
Ha…not d boldest perhaps…but definitely the most outrageous thing….
I mean… It was embarrassing at first…but after a while I totally don’t care….
Not as if those people will ever remember me…. haha

In life, the boldest thing one can do….is to decide to move on….
afterall…. change is the only constant in life…..
I’m still in the midst of moving on….and pray that A will move on too….
(when I’m done moving on…I’ll invite u all to my house-warming…ha)
it is sad….it is disappointing….yes…. but God surely has a better plan in store for me…
so right now…I’ll stay contented in my singlehood….and be a woman after God’s own heart….

Blessed are the ones who trust in the Lord…whose confidence is in Him….

2005-05-21T01:31:00.000+08:00

typed a previous blog....
but even before i could publish it..... my com hangs!!!
haha... and since it's already past midnight...and i'm so tired..... it's gone....i cannot be bothered to retype it anyway......

Nevertheless.....no matter how late it is....and what not..... i still wanna say....
Congrats to Hong Yi...B.S.C.E with Highest Distinction eh!!
I'm so proud of you...haha..... pretty and smart ok.....

Having a sore on my eye now...but it's not a sore eye ok....
it's irritating and painful.... y did it happen? is it coz some patient's toxic and potent saliva splashed into my eyes today? sighz...forgot to wear goggles today.....
looks ugly...=(

And.....
TMR!
9 to 6...at Toa Payoh Interchange the square there...... we're having a.....
FREE Public Dental Health Screening!
DO come....if you can....haha....but actually...d lesser d crowd d better....
for relaxing for me mah...haha
but but..... come if you wan dental consult.... I'll be doing the 12 to 3 shift....(place will be hot =( )

(this is a very hard b'day cake of Jiahong......)

2005-05-01T00:26:00.000+08:00

Today someone asked me:
Do i have skeletons in my closet?

Do you know what this phrase means? I don't...... I tot she's trying to be funny with me like you know....Is there a monster under my bed kinda question......

So she explained that skeletons mean things you don't want pple to know bout....
So i answer...yeah....it's messy....and so i won't want to let pple look inside my closet

And i get this quizzical look from my friends......
Skeletons in the closet actually means...... things in your LIFE that you don't wanna let pple know....!!!!

hahaha....made a fool of myself with my not up-to-standard english knowledge.....

2005-04-14T23:01:00.000+08:00

I've always wanted to do this... but today...i'm convicted.... I wanna do tt....
I wanna be an Oral Surgeon!!

Oral Surgery has always interest me BUT I didn't think I would be able to do that....
but this week after seeing surgery being done, and hearing bout' those surgeons' story of how tho' they grad later den their peers in dental school, taking re papers and yet still can get into OS grad school....I'm reignited with new hope and passion....

Today, I heard a conversation betwn 2 oral surgeons bout this lady who has a Squamous cell carcinoma in the mouth....and they can't do anything bout it coz d lady can't afford it...d son's bankrupt and so d old lady doesn't want to do it....

She could live probably 3 years after the operation....

But becoz of financial reasons....she will only have 2 months.... and will die horribly and painfully...

It just so saddens me....

I could even sense the exasperation in the tone of the oral surgeons....

SIGHZ

2005-04-12T21:28:00.000+08:00

I'm back!!!
ActuallyI've been back for quite some time already... and this is even the 2nd day of school...

So glad that this week it's Oral surgery posting for me... so I don't have to see patients....
Had a GA operation today...nonono....I didn't perform the op...
I was the '3rd surgeon'.... hahaha....
Only helped in holding some tissue and flaps retractor...it was a plastic surgery kinda things whereby the patient wants to have his mandible pushed out more...
So we had to split his mandible(and take out his wisdom teeth since we're opening up anyway), and shift the mandible and fasten the new position with screw...
It was all in all.....

Very BLOODY!

It was so bloody that the suction cannot suck fast enough that blood can trickle down the side of the patient's mouth...like those movie showing pple who died....
And after the patient was knocked out, the anaesthetist had to insert a endotrachael tube....
after which, the patient just kept bleeding from the nose to the mouth... and he doesn't even know!
The patient lost about 1 litre of blood….

Now back to China....

It was a very very good trip for me... I've learnt many stuffs....and I love China...
I won't mind staying long term in China next time....coming back was even a bit sad for me...

More bout' d trip later on....

reality...

2005-03-25T00:41:00.000+08:00

It has not been a long time since I last blog...but somehow it feels like eons

The whole week of events...

The roller coaster ride of emotions....

Do ignore my previous blog bout sun-tanning and all...

In reality, my hol is far from the ideal picture i painted it to be....

how shall i put it?

i don't quite know how to blog either...

i mean.... i wanted to write bout happy and funny staffs....i want to be just like tt....

but i can't settle myself to be so...instead.... it's all serious and heavy stuffs.....

these are the things on my mind now....

and yet...there's a fear of blogging what i'm going thru...how i feel...

coz... it's weird to have pple come ask you how are you....

coz they've 'read from my blog tt i'm like this now'

yah....i'm introvert....

not to worry tho'....i'm not in depression or under great stress...

n He has shown me grace..and love to bring me through...

in a few simple words.....reality now is:

The right lung's collapsed

Difficulty breathing

2nd line chemo

few more months....

there....in those few words.... reality can be so easily summarised....

but d experience of it is far from being easy....

exam's over!

2005-03-20T00:56:00.000+08:00

Exam's over~... =(

NO more studying to be done, NO more stress and pimples....

Let me spend a minute silence in tribute to all my dark eye rings... and eye bags.... i hope i'll never see them ever again!

...

...

...

...

...

1 minute's up....

So~...it's holiday!!!! (tear glistering in my eyes...)
(sorry for those still studying.... i sincerely feel for you....)

I shall go get my sun tan...and slack for all i can... tho' only next week....

Then.....I shall pack my luggage.....

And begin on this journey of my life.....

I shall fly away

to a foreign land....

to a land of my roots...

and proclaim: "Taiwan belongs to China!!! Zhong guo ren zhen xing!"

Ha....nah..... I'm only going to Yunnan...and Chengdu...for 2 weeks
Will be going there for FYP...and at d same time....imparting some 'long lost' dental skills to the village doctors at Mount Er Mei.... Wahaha~!

It's good to have holidays..... =)
But don't....don't....don't ever remind me of 's_ _ _ _ l' after my hol.... =(

turtle and snail

2005-03-09T00:05:00.000+08:00

Turtle and snail...
Hahaha....
I saw this pic online....and it just remember of something i have before....
something you made for me....remember?

Life support...Y/N?

2005-03-07T09:57:00.000+08:00

Life support...Y/N?

Recently had a friend... whose mum had a bad fall....ended up in ICU. According to the doctor, she will become either brain dead or vegetative....

After much considerations... the family decided to take the mum off life support...

However, the police would not allow that, as now the bld pressure of his mum has stabilised...which would categorise the death as unnatural if taken off life support...

AND THIS CAUSED THE FAMILY TO BE DISTURBED!

They felt that the mother had suffered enough...and if they do not take her off the life support...she will just be vegetative....and die few months/years later of infection...

What if she is actually fighting...fighting to live too? How does the family know she suffering and wanted to die, or if her will to live is stronger?

No doubt, this family of doctors has many reasons why the mum could/should not live...

But there's also been reports of miracles where people do wake up isn't it? There's always such hope that family members will harbour rite?

I don't know...but i just feel disappointed i guess...

For me, I'll continue to pray for the mum to get well....

At least...she managed to get this far....

2005-03-07T01:22:00.000+08:00

Countdown to 3rd pro: 7 days...

I kinda like study breaks....except of coz....for the fact that
Study breaks are meant for me to study!
sianz....

2005-02-28T21:51:00.000+08:00

I'm a violent girl! I mean...violet...

VIOLET

You surround yourself with art and music and are constantly driven to express yourself. You often daydream. You prefer honesty in your relationships and belive strongly in your personal morals.

Find out your color at Quiz Me!

OK...tt's all bout me for an intro...